a fistful of yellow

He came running up to her grasping onto a handful of brightly yellowed dandelions and she smiled at his innocence. Already he knew that flowers were for girls and she sighed knowing that he had such a tender soul and the biggest brown eyes that matched. Both would weep she knew it as a mother, a woman, and as a human being.

“Are those for me?” She asked as she knelt down to receive the tenth carelessly picked bunch from his fist that summer.

“No Mum these aren’t for you!” He declared sounding a little more defiant than she had heard before. Her eyes widened a little and she put on her pouty face for him.

“Not for me? Than who are they for?” She was hesitant at this point and was hoping that he had indeed picked them for one of his sisters.

“They’re for her!” He turned around and pointed at the neighbor’s little girl who was standing with her hands held behind her back and smiling. That smile that was the first smile you ever gave a boy when you knew you liked them.

“Go give to them to her” She whispered in his ear and he turned to her.

“Don’t worry mum the next ones will be for you.” He ran off to the neighbor’s yard and clumsily thrust the flowers to the girl. She smiled at him and turned away not accepting the flowers but returned a small giggle instead. Confused he tilted his head to the side not understanding the game the little girl was playing. A minute later she went inside “to play” she told him.

Still kneeling she watched her son walk back to her side and saw his face which was once happy now crushed and his eyes cast downward.

“She didn’t want them. How come she didn’t want them?” She thought he might cry but he wasn’t and she breathed a sigh of relief. She tilted his face upward by his chin as all mothers do and looked at him in the eye.

“Sometimes you can’t always give a gift and expect what you want back. It’s really really nice of you to do that but sometimes the other person just doesn’t feel the same way you do. And it hurts but you move on.” She figured this was the easiest and most abrupt way to explain to him that the little girl just wasn’t interested or that she was probably playing cat and mouse with him.

“But they really ARE pretty flowers.” He declared and she took them from his hand as to make use of his gift and that they wouldn’t go unnoticed.

“Yes they are but you can promise the moon to someone and if they’re not willing to accept it than what’s the use?” Her remark came out a little more caustic than usual and he looked up at her noticing the change of tone in her voice. She scrunched up her face at him to let him know she was okay.

“Mum…”

“Yes Son…”

“I hope the girl I marry is just as nice as you are. You took my flowers.” She smiled towards her son and stood up. He was still hers and she hoped that the lesson today would stay in his mind forever.

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